ENVIRONMENTALIST

.
I am an environmentalist:
Like a prophet of old
I tell you how wicked you are,
And what you must do,
And what you must not.

I make sure you are told
Not to go far,
Nor to use your car,
While to travel by plane
Is obscene.

For because of your sins
There will come great winds,
Which will destroy you.

I like controlling people's lives;
I love to make you feel afraid,
Unless my edicts are obeyed.

I want you to admit your guilt,
And grieve and wilt,
Bowed down by the lies I tell you.

For it's all a hoax,
And the biggest joke's
On you.

I feed my computer
With all kinds of data,
And sooner or later
I get the result I want.

Then I threaten the masses
With greenhouse gases,
And fill their lives with fear;
And its taught in schools
By deluded fools,
Believing what they hear.

I make the little children cry:
They think that they will surely die
Before they are much older.
They think the joy and glee they know
Will perish in incandescent glow;
That's what I tell them.

Around the globe my lies have whirled:
The flag of nonsense is unfurled;
At your expense I travel the world,
And ruthlessly distort the truth.

For there are many places
Where the weather's colder;
But I don't tell you that:
It interferes with my plan;
I'm having fun while I can.

I love to go to conferences
In romantic places,
And mouth my fraudulent dirge:
I'm pretending to save the planet
By travel and talk,
By eating fat pork,
And drinking.

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